Deflecting vs. Dismissing

Attribute	Deflecting	Dismissing
Definition	Redirecting attention or blame away from oneself	Ignoring or rejecting something as unimportant or unworthy of consideration
Response	Responding indirectly or evasively	Rejecting outright or without further consideration
Impact	May avoid confrontation or responsibility	Can dismiss valid concerns or feedback
Communication style	Can be seen as defensive or manipulative	May come across as dismissive or uncaring

Definition

Deflecting and dismissing are two common defense mechanisms that people use to protect themselves from uncomfortable emotions or situations. Deflecting involves redirecting attention away from oneself by changing the subject or making a joke. It is a way of avoiding dealing with the issue at hand. Dismissing, on the other hand, involves minimizing the importance of something or pretending that it doesn't affect you. It is a way of invalidating the feelings or concerns of others.

Effectiveness

Both deflecting and dismissing can be effective in the short term as they allow a person to avoid confronting difficult emotions or situations. However, in the long run, these defense mechanisms can be harmful as they prevent true emotional growth and can damage relationships. Deflecting can make others feel unheard or unimportant, while dismissing can lead to feelings of invalidation and resentment.

Impact on Relationships

Deflecting and dismissing can have a negative impact on relationships. When someone consistently deflects during conversations, it can make the other person feel like their feelings are not being taken seriously. This can lead to a breakdown in communication and trust. Similarly, when someone dismisses the concerns of others, it can create feelings of resentment and distance in the relationship.

Self-Awareness

Being aware of when you are using deflecting or dismissing as defense mechanisms is the first step towards changing these behaviors. It is important to recognize when you are avoiding difficult emotions or situations and to take steps to address them in a healthy way. This may involve seeking support from a therapist or counselor to work through underlying issues.

Coping Strategies

Instead of relying on deflecting or dismissing, there are healthier coping strategies that can be used to deal with difficult emotions or situations. These may include mindfulness techniques, journaling, talking to a trusted friend or family member, or engaging in physical activity. By facing emotions head-on and processing them in a healthy way, you can build emotional resilience and strengthen your relationships.

Seeking Help

If you find that you are consistently using deflecting or dismissing as defense mechanisms and it is impacting your relationships or mental health, it may be beneficial to seek help from a mental health professional. A therapist can help you explore the underlying reasons for these behaviors and develop healthier coping strategies. Remember, it is okay to ask for help when you need it.